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"89 Ways to Write Powerful Press Releases"
Lesson #46: No alphabet soup
Acronyms and abbreviations make
press releases difficult to read. This press release, about a
scientist who will tell a community whether it has a
higher-than-normal rate of cancer, had several unnecessary acronyms
and abbreviations which I removed when I rewrote it. I also added a
headline.
The "before" version, by the way,
got great media coverage from the local newspaper and TV stations.
BEFORE
Livingston County Environmental
Association
P.O. Box 798
Pontiac, IL 61764
April 25, 2006
PRESS RELEASE
The Livingston County Environmental Association (LCEA) is sponsoring
a program on cancer rates in Livingston County. On Thursday, May 11
at 7 p.m. at Pontiac City Council Chambers, Peter Moschovis of the
University of Illinois at Chicago (UIC) will present the results of
his study of cancer rates in Livingston County. The public is
invited to attend. There will be an open discussion after the
speech.
The study’s goals were: (1) to determine whether Livingston County
or any area within Livingston County has experienced
higher-than-expected rates of any reported disease or category of
disease; (2) to identify any limitations of, or gaps in, the
available data, including whether diseases not currently being
reported may warrant investigation; and (3) to report whether any
diseases seen at high rates are generally suspected of having any
special causative factors related to environmental exposures.
LCEA commissioned and paid for the study in response to numerous
comments and questions from the public about cancer in this area.
LCEA had collected over 200 signatures on a petition asking for
study of the issue at the American Cancer Society’s Relay for Life.
“People are always saying that Livingston County has too much
cancer,” said LCEA President Carolyn Gerwin, “so as a public service
LCEA hired a qualified epidemiologist to do a scientific study to
see if it’s true.”
Under an agreement between LCEA and UIC, Peter Moschovis met with
local doctors and reviewed the available cancer statistics. He also
collected information about the incidence of amyelotrophic lateral
sclerosis (Lou Gehrig’s disease) in our county. He was supervised by
Dr. Leslie Stayner, Director of UIC’s Division of Epidemiology and
Biostatistics. Epidemiology is the scientific study of the
occurrence of disease in a given population, which requires in-depth
knowledge of statistical methods, disease transmission, and
population demographics.
As an undergraduate at UIC, Mr. Moschovis was inducted into the Phi
Beta Kappa honor society. He was one of 50 students chosen
nationwide to receive a highly competitive Phi Beta Kappa graduate
fellowship. He was awarded a prestigious Fulbright scholarship to
study refugee public health issues in Greece. Mr. Moschovis has
completed the requirements to receive a Master of Public Health
(MPH) master’s degree from the University of Illinois at Chicago. In
addition, Mr. Moschovis will graduate from the University of
Chicago’s Pritzker School of Medicine this spring. He will begin a
residency in internal medicine at world-renowned Massachusetts
General Hospital in Boston this summer.
LCEA was formed in 2003 after a local citizens group challenged the
expansion of Livingston Landfill. This study was paid for with funds
received in the citizens group’s settlement of that appeal. LCEA is
non-profit organization dedicated to protecting the natural
resources, health and welfare of Livingston County. The group’s
meetings are held at 6:30 p.m. on the second Monday of odd-numbered
months at Mary’s Restaurant in Pontiac.
* * *
Please call if you have any questions.
Livingston County Environmental Association
Carolyn K. Gerwin
President
705 S. Locust St.
Pontiac IL 61764
(815) 842-2486
gerwin@mchsi.com
AFTER
Contact:
Carolyn K.
Gerwin
President
705 S. Locust St.
Pontiac IL 61764
(815) 842-2486
gerwin@mchsi.com
Higher-than-normal cancer rate in Livingston
County?
Scientist will discuss his findings May 22
Pontiac, Illinois -- April 25,
2006 -- Residents of Livingston County who suspect
higher-than-normal rates of cancer in their community can hear a
scientist discuss what his study has found at 7 p.m. May 22 in the
Pontiac City Council Chambers.
The Livingston County Environmental Association hired Peter
Moschovis, an epidemiologist with the University of Illinois at
Chicago, to study cancer rates after more than 200 residents
signed a petition saying they were concerned that too many people in their community had
cancer.
“As a public service, we hired a qualified
epidemiologist to do a scientific study to see if it’s true,” said
Carolyn Gerwin, president of the environmental association.
Moschovis met with local doctors and reviewed cancer statistics and
collected information about the incidence of Lou Gehrig’s Disease.
He also studied whether cancer and other diseases aren’t being
reported, and whether higher-than-normal rates of any diseases are
believed to be caused by environmental factors.
The Livingston County Environmental Association was formed in 2003
after a local citizens group challenged the expansion of Livingston
Landfill. The association settled that appeal and used money from
the settlement to pay for the cancer study.
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Opportunity #46:
New contract
If you've won or awarded a new
contract, write a press release. Include the value of the contract,
when the work will be completed, and other relevant details.
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